1. |
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I don't feel like telling you everything
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2. |
Blood For Blood
03:08
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If I turned to you when the curtain dropped
Would it be clear to me that it fucked you up?
Never really knew how you took that stuff
Did the tears disappear or were your ducts taped shut
Keep your ears perked for my special knock
Overdue for the two days your room’s been locked
But I don’t have the pulse for heart-to-heart talks
Or the headspace to displace this mental block
That’s both of ours to own
But it called your skull home
While I willed mine hollow
Just screening your calls, set the service bar low
Blood for blood, what’s the difference
We were one, now we’re drifting
Shut me up, I’m just crazy
Who am I to do the saving?
Blood for blood, it’s been dripping
Deeper cut, shoddy stitching
What the fuck are we chasing
Swear it used to be the same thing
No use living well if it all leads up
to some tailored sleeves that you’re scared to tug
Thought I’d hear a sob as I packed my stuff
But the air was still as it ever was
Where have you been storing what you don’t say
Is there still no word on a release date
For all you’ve filtered out or tweaked away
Fine-tuned to inaudible frequencies
But I still listen close
Still moved by every tone
A sound I refuse to outgrow
Though it’s flickering out with each new candle blown
You and me are trouble
As kids we were told
That our luck would double
If we took our separate roads
Said I’d call you later
But I never do
Fire up the debate of
Who has given up on who
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3. |
Slick
02:28
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my character is breaking, the effort's blatant like hair gel flaking
I'm tepid and unbothered while they trade hollers behind popped collars
i'm choke-held to a standard that keeps me flattered, but leaves me shattered
still i follow your blazer down halls that taper into hushed ragers
and now it's time for me to misremember the hangouts i would flee, handouts i severed
but if somehow my leaving made things better, why would you risk having me back around
when it was clear to me you need a partner, a pair of eyes you've deemed less keen, but sharper
to navigate a scene that's since grown darker, it was too late to turn the car around
it's a hazy crowd, don't get drowned and expect to be found
it's the same last round, and now i know why you tapped out
my chemistry's off-balance, my face is calloused and slick with malice
i'm polished to a stranger who's placing wagers against my nature
but we're great entertainers, our best bits savored and spat out later
by those wholly indifferent to where our night ends if it's not with them
and now it's time for me to have accepted that no one's bothering to read the legend on my personal heat-map of resentment. why don't i have a seat and simmer down
no pouting in the scenes i wrote them out of when the script clearly reads i loved this outcome.
any choice you decree becomes the right one when said five times in the mirror out loud.
it's a hazy crowd, don't get drowned and expect to be found. It's the same last round, and now i know why you tapped out.
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4. |
Dogsitter
04:33
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I like it better when you shut your eyes
We shake you awake and then say goodbye
You thought I left but no, I’m here all night
Singing what am I doing, what am I doing
It all slides off your back and lands on mine
Bound as a sacrifice to the divine
Thought it would kill me but I’m still alive
Singing what am I doing
Bow down, however you may
Know you should get going but I want you to stay
I’ll sing you the song that gets me through every day
And it goes dog sitter, we all miss her
Don’t call, I’m boarding a plane
Don’t ask where I’m going, I’ll be back in a day
To turn down your body but still care where it lays
‘Cause you’re the dogsitter, we can’t quit her
You like it better when you feel deprived
With eyes that can’t possibly get more wide
You got a man and yet you’re here all night
Singing what am I doing, what am I doing
It slips out of my hands and leaves its slime
So any trace that’s left is clearly mine
Follow it back to me and feign surprise
Singing what am I doing
What am I doing
Sit down, I’m having a day
Was high when I got here, I’ll forget what you say
But sing me a song and from this hell I’ll be saved
‘Cause you’re the dogsitter, we all miss her
Move on, however you may
I still want your body but it’s forgetting me
Your face will escape me, oh but never the phrase
And it goes dogsitter, when can’t quit her
No matter how hollow you make me feel
No matter how awful to think you’re real
No matter what you said about me then
It’s never as hopeful as I’d intend
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5. |
Dream Ease
03:04
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The boy who cried 'in love' misled your flesh and blood and everyone knows it
Each good night sleep since then has placed me in your debt and everyone knows it
But i'll keep your payback out in plain sight behind a door I'll fail to lock tight
And I'll be out cold, an open invite to straddle my REM cycle like a bike
Haunt me in my dreams tonight
Slide right in I'll leave the light on
I'm not alone if I've got your spite
Won't you just haunt me in my dreams tonight
Character weakened from six volumes of page ones and everyone knows it
A feeble frame I earned from a diet of my own words and everyone knows it
Now you're the server in my fucked mind and bring out the same thing every time her withered body crashes with mine to make sure we both puke out our enzymes
Coulda gave me the cure for nightmares
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6. |
Only Here as a Plus One
01:03
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Faded times, I waited in line, took my time with this one. You tried to kiss one too. There's no way out of the room with the most fun but I'm only here as a plus one.
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7. |
Secret Songe
02:33
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night-time’s the only time i breathe
at a physician-approved speed
i know i called this twilight meet
but let me set the tempo
I know you love a desperate plea
and i’ve got one queued up on my screen
but once the feelings start curdling
it spoils my manifesto
This ain't the last park bench we’ll haunt
with guesses of what the other wants
cause your list is shorter than i thought
and mine is designed to hurt you
what kind of loser locks his keys inside the car
or someone stole them just to watch us try so hard
to beat the odds of us leaving here arm in arm
kidding ourselves it’s the last time
aren't you glad the hand of fate knows who we are
they bring us together just to watch us fall apart
I'm back at the nexus at which teardrop meets guitar
singing your name for the last time
secret song
the soundtrack to you
pacing circles round your room
burning purple leaves to all the things you'll say to me
nighttimes the only time we meet
away from those who can’t hold their peace
the doorway to our honeymoon suite
will be home to a picket line so
I know these stars were crossed by me
i rearrange them while you sleep
you wanted my true self to roam free
but i think he needs a curfew
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8. |
Coil
03:25
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Back on the street where you pinedfor the simple times
The kind i’m desperate to drive somewhere out of mind
Thought every record was wiped, but a backup is stored in your gaze
i can’t look you in the face
Recast your absence with friends who don’t realize
your name will be in the credits of my demise
since we’ve been role playing as strangers for so long
it’s hard to keep track of who was in on the act
you’re just a walk away
memories are thawing in my head
here lies the mess i made just the same as how i left it then
out of its resting place in my brain as something to forget
do not resuscitate,
give up the ghost now
i went out looking for signs with my head held high
was really looking for planes, you’re due back tonight
Assumed you’d land nowhere near ground i stomp on
well unlucky guess, cause here you are in the flesh
stuck to the opposite wall with your shifty eyes
unsure of whether it’s me or a lookalike
the lesson being there’s hardly a difference
I’m not one of one, just find another and run
oh what the fuck am i doing
walk away and start unspooling
trace my loose threads back to you and
drain the thrill from this chase, tonight my theories deflate, love
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9. |
Personal Tree
03:08
|
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It's in your personal tree
The cyanide, this suicidal dream
A subterranean scream
You can't decide to where it's trying to lead
Take what you want from me
You know I'll see you when the moon shines
The one you came to see
Oh I can take them to you all night
It's in your personal tree
It crept inside the bed we shared last week
No way of making it leave
It knows to hide, it changes with the scene
I can't describe, I just want to unsee
I saw something there, everyone was unaware
You get high and I get scared
Never thought i'd see you there
Take what you want from me
Oh what's a fair exchange for 'goodbye'
Not what we used to be
But we can excavate the good times
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10. |
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It doesn't matter
The ship still sinks
Thought we'd clink glasses to it
But you quit the drink
It doesn't matter
you still look flushed
Doomed to be an imposter
Til the gig is up
but I just called to say
that i got home okay
I rested somewhere between death and sleep
And woke up knowing that
You aren't coming back
And knew somehow that's how it had to be
You and me were drawn together
Standing dateless on the floor
If i'd lead, we'd waltz forever
It doesn't matter anymore
Fallen leaves don't grow back better
Just the way they were before
Running free is just a gesture
it doesn't matter anymore
It doesn't matter
We all bought in
Outdid our demons in terms
of possessing things
It kicks in faster
When they cut their lines
On things you placed on tables
Cuz they looked nice
But don't you go and say
'la vie est compliqué'
'cause I have no idea what you mean
We shared one true glance
Then you took off your pants
and taught me things are always what they seem
You and me were drawn together
Standing dateless on the floor
If i'd lead, we'd waltz forever
It doesn't matter anymore
Fallen leaves don't grow back better
Just the way they were before
Running free is just a gesture
it doesn't matter anymore
It doens't matter anymore
Nothing matters anymore
|
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